


How to Take Advantage of a Situation

by SushiOwl



Series: Fake Date, Might Be Real Date [1]
Category: Teen Wolf (TV)
Genre: Bickering, Fake/Pretend Relationship, M/M, Pining, Sarcasm, butt touch
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2018-05-11
Updated: 2018-05-11
Packaged: 2019-05-05 11:36:56
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,065
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/14617608
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/SushiOwl/pseuds/SushiOwl
Summary: Prompt fill for Peter/Deuc fake date trope, the starter sentence being "Why is your hand on my ass?"





	How to Take Advantage of a Situation

This was ridiculous. Deucalion did not need to be led about like a helpless pup. Peter knew that, so he must have been doing this to mess with him. Peter was keeping a hand on his elbow, directing him this way and that. “Mind the stairs,” he had said once, though Deucalion had of course known they were there. “Ah, don’t walk into a staff, darling,” he said one other time as they were moving through the club. Peter had apologized to the woman, who tittered like a school girl.

Deucalion was going to whack Peter in the shin with his cane if he didn’t stop.

But then, he felt something unmistakable, something he didn’t need eyes to know what it was. “Why is your hand on my ass?” he asked, as mildly as possible.

“I don’t want to lose you, dear,” Peter told him, amusement dripping from his voice.

Deucalion flicked his cane to the side, felt the impact vibrate through his fingers, and smiled as he heard Peter stumble and curse. “Watch your step, dear boy.”

“You volunteered for this mission, you know,” Peter said, sounding annoyed, which Deucalion took as a private victory.

“I did,” Deucalion agreed before he got his hand on Peter’s shoulder. “Do you see our target?”

“No,” Peter told him after a moment before he started moving. Deucalion could only follow, cane sweeping before him. “Can you hear anything?”

Deucalion stretched out his hearing. “Not yet. But there are still cars in the valet line. He may be here soon.” He knew their target’s voice, for he had had dealings with him before. That was why he had volunteered, not because it meant he had the chance to pretend to be Peter’s lover at a swanky couples club. No, that… That was merely a pleasant coincidence.

When he had been able to see, Peter had been an annoying 20-year-old pain in his sister’s side. Now he was older and a fair amount colder, but that was to be expected. Deucalion didn’t know what he looked like these days, and he doubted he’d get a chance to touch his face… at least in any manner that wasn’t punching it.

“Let’s go to the bar. We’ll look less like we’re scanning the place if we’re drinking,” Peter said, turning that way, and Deucalion fell at his side, just a step behind.

“I suppose that’s a decent enough idea,” Deucalion said with a put-on sigh. Honestly, he could go for a drink. Even if alcohol did nothing for him, the motion was relaxing.

“I’m sorry, do you have a better one?” Peter shot back with a mild irritation before he stopped. “Yes, hello dear, could I have a Seven and Seven, please?”

Deucalion started dismantling his cane, finding the leg of a bar stool with his foot and hoisting himself onto it. He opened his mouth to order himself a drink.

“And an Old Fashioned for my companion here.”

Deucalion shut his mouth, brows coming together. He waited for the bartender to step away before he turned his ear to Peter. “How did you know that was my order?”

Peter didn’t answer right away. “Talia told me.”

“And why would she do that?”

This time, Peter didn’t say anything, and Deucalion was about to prod him, but then he heard a familiar voice and turned his hearing toward it. “He’s here.”

Peter turned on his stool, his knee bumping Deucalion’s thigh. “I see him.”

Deucalion got off his stool as Peter did the same, and he caught Peter’s arm. “Easy, boy, he has three people with him. Your nephew didn’t want us to cause a scene.”

Peter let out a displeased noise.

Deucalion listened for a moment. “He’s heading for the restroom, and he’s going alone. Let us follow?”

“Good idea,” Peter told him, and they were moving again. They moved in an arc around people, then down a hallway and around a corner. When they stopped, the noise of the club was dim. “Is he alone in there?”

Deucalion listened. “Yes.”

Peter broke away, rushing into the bathroom, and he heard a cry of pain. That would be Peter blasting their target in the face with a substance that prevented him from blasting lasers from his pupils. Deucalion had been secretly jealous when he’d learned he could do that.

There was quite a bit of commotion for a minute, then the door banged open, and their target stumbled into him, blinded and feeble. Deucalion got his arm around his neck and walked him back into the bathroom. “You let him get free,” he said in a chiding tone, locking the door behind him.

“He hit me with a sink,” Peter hissed.

“You let him hit you with a sink?” Deucalion asked as their target pulled at his arm to little effect. He may have had laser eyes, but he was still physically strong as a regular human man.

“No one expects to be  _hit with a sink!_ ”

“You are in a bathroom,” Deucalion reasoned before he smiled as Peter growled at him. “Perhaps you should broaden your expectations.”

“Perhaps you should shut up,” Peter grumbled.

Deucalion heard Peter come closer. He listened to the ruffling of fabric and the useless complaining of their target as he was searched.

“Got it,” Peter said finally.

What he had was the Luna Diamond, a crystal that could give or take away one’s lycanthropy if used by a powerful enough magic wielder. Their target had been about to sell it to a sorcerer. They couldn’t have that.

“Congratulations, you know how to frisk someone,” Deucalion told Peter with a smile.

“You guys need couple’s counseling,” the man wheezed, and Deucalion promptly choked him out.

Deucalion fixed his clothing and unfurled his cane. “Shall we?”

“I’m bleeding a little,” Peter said. “And my shirt is destroyed.” He sounded more annoyed about that part.

“Out the back then?” Deucalion suggested, unlocking the door as he squashed the urge to touch Peter’s face, maybe taking away any pain.

“Good idea,” Peter agreed.

“Lead the way,” Deucalion said. Peter caught his elbow and started leading him farther down the hall, but instead of allowing that, Deucalion freed his arm and just put his hand right on Peter’s ass.

“…Uh?” Peter asked, frozen in place.

“Maybe I don’t want to lose you either, darling,” Deucalion said, then goosed him.

**Author's Note:**

> Hey! [Come check out my tumblr!](http://thesushiowl.tumblr.com/tagged/prompt+week) I take a week a month to fill prompts. :>


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